#unsure #uncertain
Feeling unsure is a normal emotion and it’s like being stuck, directionless, empty, unmotivated, powerless or even numb! Even feeling ‘nothing’ can be described as feeling unsure.
Why do we feel unsure?
It may be frightening or troubling when we feel emotional numbness or emptiness. But everyone feels unsure at some point in their daily lives. Some can struggle with unsureness more than others and nobody is exempt. It’s how we respond to this feeling of uncertainty that makes the difference–whether we let it affect us or even frighten us.
The first thing to do is try and pinpoint how we feel unsure, and what has made us feel this way.
Considering feelings of uncertainty is an umbrella term for a range of emotions, so let’s try and identify what exactly we mean by feeling “unsure”. We might feel:
But what are the triggers that have prompted this uncertainty? It might be because of:
Identifying these components can help us identify and pinpoint the problem and find solutions to remove this feeling of uncertainty.
#clarity #certainty #sure
We would like to remind you of three key things that can help reshape your mindset and free you from feeling unmotivated, unworthy, and stuck:
1. You don’t have to be perfect!
Perfection is an unrealistic illusion. It’s fine to have life goals, for example, but what we set out to do may never be achieved completely—aiming for perfection may even prevent us from starting out in the first place. Fear of never reaching our expectations can stop us from ever trying in the first place
2. Remember the strongest people don’t always succeed in what they set out to do.
People don’t always have complete confidence, but they do stay the course even if they don’t feel it or believe they deserve success What matters is the fact that we try and don’t give up easily.
3. And it’s not what we are that holds us back, it’s what we think we’re not or can’t do.
Ultimately, it is what we think that makes us who we are. Don’t let insecure thoughts to overshadow the amazing truth of who we are. We are good enough!
A few techniques on how to overcome the reasons why we may feel unsure include:
1. Create a comprehensive to-do list
We often feel unsure because we can feel lost in an overwhelming sea of tasks, causing us to feel directionless and unmotivated. Feeling overwhelmed isn’t about not knowing what to do, just not knowing what to do next.
Create a list of everything you need to do. Rank each task in terms of priority, and under each activity, list every sub-task. For example, if you need to write an essay, break this down into sub-tasks such as writing a title, devise three arguments, read a scholarly article. Laying everything out and being able to tick off the tasks gives us a sense of achievement, making us feel on track.
2. Take time off for favourite hobbies
If we feel empty or a bit numb, it may be a good idea to do something we enjoy, or an activity that challenges and absorbs us. Whether it’s something creative like cooking or even drawing, something nature-related like gardening, or even a new sport, doing these activities may help us feel again.
3. Talk to someone
Feeling unsure can be a scary and even lonely time. Reach out to a trusted friend, family member, guardian, or even a mentor who you can speak to. Doing so can give an objective perspective on our problems and solutions we may have overlooked.
We also strongly recommend speaking to a mental health professional. They are the trained experts and serious cases of emotional numbness can be a sign of depression. Regardless, psychologists and counsellors are trained to help us cope with any difficulties we face, so it’s very worthwhile to get professional assistance and the right tools and techniques to help us break free from feeling uncertain or empty.
4. Acknowledge the emptiness
Sometimes, feeling empty may be the result of a loss or big change in our lives. Grief can look and feel different to everyone, and people respond differently to it. There are no right or wrong ways to deal with it. Feeling empty can even be a prelude to the different stages of grief.
In this case, give yourself time and space to grieve openly, and speak to someone who can listen with a kind and loving heart and give you the support you need and deserve.
Conclusion
Feeling unsure is often a vague and confusing emotion but when we can identify why we feel this way, it opens avenues to help us cope with this emotion.
If we start to doubt ourselves, just remember how far we’ve come–everything we’ve faced, the battles we’ve won, and the fears we’ve overcome.
#clarity #perspective
I’ve been feeling weird lately... like something wasn’t quite right. It felt like something was wrong but I wasn’t sure why. This feeling has been nagging at me for weeks now and is bothering me because I really don’t understand it!
There is nothing wrong in my life, at school or at home. My friends are great, and my family even greater. But it has gotten to the point that my sleep has been affected and I’ve been feeling more irritable lately, and less myself. I don’t even want to hang out with my friends anymore, or go out to eat with my family - I just want to stay in bed and be by myself. My parents dragged me to the doctors last week, because they feel that we should think about mental health as we should about physical health. I didn’t understand it before but I think I understand it a bit more now.
Imagine playing a sport and you trip and roll your ankle. When we injure our body, we go to the doctor who assesses our injury, and they will point us towards a specialist like a physio. We then learn from the physio about our injury and are taught exercises to aid recovery. We’re then tasked with completing these exercises over time, along with strategies such as rest, until we recover fully.
With mental health, if for example something traumatic occurs in our lives or we just don’t feel quite right, what do we do? Well, what we don’t often do (but what we should be doing is) going to our doctor and explaining these feelings that we have. Our doctor will then write us a referral to see a mental health practitioner like a psychologist, who will then work with us to understand why we’re feeling self-conscious and what strategies we can use to alleviate these feelings.
Like with physio and exercising our body, we must be constantly exercising our mind, implementing the strategies we’ve been taught, to recover from our mental health challenge, like we would our physical injury.
And once we recover, we shouldn’t stop there. When we recover from our physical injury, we get right back to maintaining our physical health in whatever way we enjoy, such as a team sport or going to the gym. The same needs to be thought of with our mental health. Our mind is something to be maintained, after all, our brain is like a muscle. Our mind needs daily or weekly exercise, performing strategies such as mindfulness meditation, forest bathing, and journalling to stay mentally healthy.
We use our minds everyday so we want a healthy mind to thrive. So just like you would go to the Physio if you got a physical injury from sport, consider seeing someone like a psychologist if you don't feel quite right mentally.
I ended up going to speak to a psychologist to cut through those weird feelings of not knowing what I was feeling, and help to bring more clarity and perspective into my mind and life. Maybe you should try the same!
MaxiMinds is not an emergency mental health service. If you or someone you know are in urgent need of help, please present to the emergency department at your nearest hospital or contact the following mental health crisis teams.
Emergency 000 | Mental Health Line 1800 011 511 | Lifeline 13 14 11